Entry tags:

stories

Tuta (part 2)
And now, the much anticipated sequel for Tuta part 1!

Original story by novartza. (Original version is here, no direct link - you have to scroll down or search for the text "הטוט" (since it's visual Hebrew).
Translated by: me again.

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I have met Nahum in the Internet Relay Chat (IRC) network. I favored him because of his innocence and honesty. Also his beard and those hairs on the sides of his chicks did it to me. I have never had a profound acquaintance with an ultra-orthodox Jew before.


People were often banning me from the chat. It's because I like messing with people's minds and giving provocative remarks, and also because they are jealous at me for being prettier and more intelligent than them. I'm 23 year old and studying archeology and ancient languages in the university.
After that I'd nag Nahum in private messages and he'd fix that, until the next time.

I asked Nahum if he would want to marry me. He said I'll have to convert to Judaism for that. I didn't know what it means, so I looked up for details about that on the internet.
Apparently it involves serious changes in my way of life. For example, avoiding using the computer, TV etc in Saturday, avoiding pizza with pepperoni and shrimps, and various other silly things. That's really far away from me. I can't understand how an intelligent person like Nahum can believe in things like that.

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"Hello?"
"Marie-Christine?"
"Who is this?"
"It's Nahum. I'm in Hilton Checkers, downtown LA."
"Nahum?! What are you doing in the USA?"
"I won a lot of money and decided to come and visit you. How is it going with you? Are you free tonight?"

I was walking in the lobby entrance and looking for him, when a clean-shaved stranger approached me. "Tuta?"
"What? It's you?!" I was shocked. He didn't even look like the guy I remembered from the picture he sent me that time.
"Yes. I took off the beard and the yarmulke. I'm a secular person now," he said.
We sat near a table and talked. Apparently he decided to leave his funny religion and his boring life he had in Israel and to move to the USA, now that he has enough money for doing so.

"Wow, I don't believe it," I told him. "So what do you want to do now?"
"…Marry you, maybe. I don't know. We'll see." He smiled in embarrassment.
"Hehehehe.." I chuckled. "You are almost at the same age as my father… but never mind. You are cute." He did look cute, with his bashfulness. I kissed him. "Do you want to come to my place now?"

He was very gentle in bed, even too gentle. I like it rougher.
The next day he woke up early and kissed on me on the lips, gently. He dressed up quietly and left.
When I woke up, I found a note.

Tuta,
I feel that it's not it. It won't work.
It never had a chance in the first place.
It's also because of the age differences and the cultural gaps…
Thank you for a night of love and fun.
I'm probably moving to another city in the USA, and I'll try to find my luck there.

- Nahum

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"Frankly, my dear Nahum…" I muttered in a paraphrase of Rhett Butler's immortal words, and wondered what to do with the note. Eventually I shoved it into one of the drawers. I played Madonna's "La Isla Bonita" while choosing what should I wear for the new day.

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Translator's notes:
The real Tuta isn't much close to the Tuta we see here. And I would like to thank Novartza, the IRC channel #israel @ efnet and the Hebrew-English dictionary of MS-Word for the great help in translating the two stories. Live, love, learn!